It’s a Date

Dear man,

You are the full package: wonderful, smart, handsome and a terrific person.

You are exactly who I would want to spend an evening with. However, I am (circle as applies)

Married A Member of Celibate Clergy
In a committed relationship Gay
Bitter and have sworn off all men (“mancation”) Geographically Undesirable (too far from you)
Of an Inappropriate Age Range Other : _______________________

Do not be sad. This certificate allows us to have that date.

Please have an excursion with Princess 12 Toes (Sonya) and take her on the date I wish I could have with you. I will ask her for details and live vicariously through her. My gift to you is a wonderful adventure with a woman who, while not as amazing as I am, is a close approximation.

Reach her at HookeronPhonics@gmail.com

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Oblivion

I am pouring 14 ounces of Cinnamon coffee (Death Star Style: large, on the dark side amd strong enough to kill a planet) and listening intently to Tiffany when she stops talking.
I out down my cup just as arms wrap around my waist and a bearded chin appears on my shoulder to kiss my cheek.

With a greeting like that:who needs sugar in their coffee?

How did I not notice him coming up to me?

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